3 Short Stories From My 3-Ring Circus

Oh man! I can't believe I haven't blogged in a month. I've got a ton of stuff to update, but I no longer have internet in my home. (Actually this is a GOOD thing.)

I've mentioned before that my life is a 3-ring circus. Well, here's why....

The other day, Lex & Jonny are home. The weather is CRAPPY and no one wants to go outside & play. I would be content to sleep in my bed ALL DAY...but the boys were BORED. Lex has seriously been bugging me all day to do this for him or do that for him. I'm feeling like a slave...a slave who only wants to lay in my bed & be left alone.

Jonny was in his room setting up a game of RISK. Lex wanders into my bedroom and asks me if I will play RISK with him & Jonny.

"No, Lex." I say, "I don't want to play RISK right now."

"But Mom....please, the game requires at least 3 players," he replies. (I find this more annoying than motivating...)

"I said NO, Lex. Why don't you and Jonny make up the 3rd player? Why don't you take turns pretending to be Bob-the-Ghost?" I say.

And...without missing a beat Lex replies, "MOM, Bob can't play RISK. Everytime he tries to take his turn his hands go right through the gamepieces." :-D

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Last night we were watching America's Best Dance Crew on MTV. I love watching the dance crews- they're awesome! Anyway, one of the crews call themselves "Royal Flush".

Lex turns to me and says, "Why would they want that name? Isn't it stupid to name your self after the Queen of England's toilet."


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There is a children's movie that came out last summer called "Planet 51". In the movie a couple of aliens are filming a commercial. The two aliens are dressed up as a tooth brush and tooth paste. And as they walk away one alien is complimenting the other alien on his acting skills as a toothbrush. The alien replies, "Thanks, but my best work is as a suppository." Jonny turns to me and asks me what a suppository is and I answer him honestly, much to his fits and giggles.

So...now fast foward to this week. We are shopping at Target to get shampoo, soap, etc. I am in the health & beauty aisle with Jonny & Lex. Such as with all of my stories, the store seems crowded. I start to head to another aisle when Jonny suddenly grabs a package of tampons off the shelf and loudly inquires, "Mom. What are these for? Are these suppositories?". You should have seen the startled faces of the 6-7 other people in the aisle.

I don't remember embarrassing my mom as much.... LOL